Wanting To Quit, But Continuing To Go By His Grace

I love this blog because I can just be honest on here. We share about the fun things we do, because when we are not doing fun things 80% of the time we are literally are trying to raise support. That might be sending emails, making calls, meeting with people, sending out letters, designing prayer letters, talking through strategy, praying, writing thank you notes, etc. There is so much that goes into raising support mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. When you are not raising support and "taking a break" you are still thinking about what you need to do. It is a job where you can always be doing more even if you are working at it from 8am to 9pm. It never leaves your mind with strategy and to do lists are always floating about in your head.

In addition, I have never really been as passionate as I am right now for the vision for Salerno, Italy for anything else that I did probably since I joined Kappa Sigma in the beginning of 2006, but even then I had to be laid back in a sense because I had to be very spiritually aware and cautious. I also had a drive playing sports in high school, but never for school in general in high school or college or working in the business world. For all of you out there that are saying, "What about your wife?", I say she is above this category because she is not something I did, she is more of the teammate running along side of me not a trophy or task that I accomplished, not ever a goal or objective.

So why do I say all of this? I say it to try to make people that have never really ever had anything that they are involved with other than there family or ever raised support a glimpse at what I am doing and why it is so hard when they do not really realize it is hard at all. The passion and the amount of dedication can cause me to be a workaholic and not really at times trust God to do anything, but almost a "I've got this Jesus" mentality. You called me to this and I am not going to let you down. Also the more passionate you are about something, the harder you work at it. I have got to trust Him daily in ministry in general, support raising or not, not only when I do not know what else to do or am really frustrated but always. He is the one with the plan who already knows how exactly our support is going to come in anyway.

Proverbs 3:5-6--Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight.